Why Bother With KEMS?

Three reasons why it’s worth your time


KEMS is still a work in progress. We’d love to hear your feedback on it, but it isn’t ready to adopt yet.

KEMS is easy to adopt and easy to use as a vetting tool. But why should you bother? Here are three reasons for instructors, students, and producers.


As an instructor, why should you bother adopting KEMS?

1. It’s the right thing to do
Your students trust you to teach them well, giving them the skills they need to engage in kink as safely as possible. And they trust you to behave ethically toward them and not take advantage of your position. By adopting KEMS code of conduct, you are committing to uphold that trust. By making the mandatory disclosures, you are giving your students the information they need to give informed consent to learn from you.

2. To drive out the predators
Predatory kink instructors are far too common and cause tremendous harm to our communities. The burden of fixing that problem can’t fall solely to survivors and students: those of us who are ethical instructors need to take responsibility for cleaning our own house. Widespread adoption of KEMS helps students identify and support ethical instructors, and avoid predatory ones.

3. Because your students expect it
Students and producers are increasingly concerned about dangerous instructors and have higher standards for ethical behavior than they once did. Adopting a code of conduct sends a clear signal that you take consent seriously and are committed to high standards as an instructor.


As a student, why should you choose KEMS-compliant instructors?

1. To protect yourself
Unfortunately, predatory instructors are very common: at the time of this writing, three of the most active rope instructors in Seattle have deeply problematic consent histories. Predators are often charming, so it’s hard to know who to trust. The KEMS mandatory disclosures help you avoid dangerous instructors.

2. To find better instructors
Ethical instructors are better instructors. An instructor who has adopted a code of conduct has shown a commitment to taking their profession seriously and prioritizing the well-being of their students and community.

3. Because you don’t want to learn from predators
People who are bad at practicing consent are bad at teaching it. If you learn from ethical people, you’ll learn healthy, consensual kink practices. But if you learn from predators… well, try not to do that.

Producers and venues

As a venue operator or event producer, why should you choose KEMS-compliant instructors?

1. To protect your attendees
People who are new to kink often don’t have experience distinguishing between kink and abuse, and may not be good at holding boundaries with authority figures. They trust you to hire ethical, competent instructors who will teach them well and keep them safe.

2. To protect yourself
Every time you hire an instructor, you put your reputation on the line. The best way to protect your reputation is to know if an instructor has a problematic history before you hire them.The KEMS mandatory disclosures help you find instructors who are aligned with your values and avoid instructors who are likely to become a liability to you.

3. It’s good for your brand
Standards for consent have risen in the kink world and kink communities have become increasingly concerned about the harm caused by unethical instructors. Adopting a code of conduct for your instructors shows attendees that you take consent seriously.

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